I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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