she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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