We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
