last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
