It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize