I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
