was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
