I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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