Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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