He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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