EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Randomize
