real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize
