I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
this is an emotional support booty call
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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