if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
