Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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