i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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