now i know why i became what i already was.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
