When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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