Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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