That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
