YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
