I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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