ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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