What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Randomize
