So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
