My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
