why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
