when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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