I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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