I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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