We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize