Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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