new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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