worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
