yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
