Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
