Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize