Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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