Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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