OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
