she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
