He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
