So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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