GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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