Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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