I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize