if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
