just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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