After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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