It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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