To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
