Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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