I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We are two peas in an std pod
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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